Saturday, October 8, 2011

WARNING--This Post Contains Lots of Complaining--Viewer Discretion is Advised

Well, I've been away from blogging for a couple of weeks. I have not been feeling well and because I have OCD, I naturally think it is the worst case scenario. I've been blue anyway, so the additional worry about health issues just adds to the blue mood.

I have not been doing anything creative, so I had nothing to talk about or show. I did start sewing scraps of fabric together, but am not sure I like the colors together. I purchased a case for all of my Faber-Castell pencils (96 in all) to be in one place rather than tins or mugs. I would like to start using them more to enhance my watercolors. And, I've been doing some doodling on the train, which I find enjoyable.

I am still in a reading mode. I am almost finished another book, something that was $.99 on line. It is entertaining. I also purchased 2 books by Jon Kabat Zinn about meditation and am reading the first one. I ordered his CDs that guide you through mediation and am waiting for them to arrive before I attempt it on my own. I've also been looking into programs for stress relief and mindfulness. I found a couple, but have missed the first classes, so I will wait until the next offering.

I think my health issues are directly related to or made worse by the way I handle stress. I allow myself to get really angry and consequently stressed by things that I see and hear that are not fair, or when people seem oblivious to me or others (especially when they are behind the wheel and I am on foot). Basically it is about people who seem to believe that are entitled. 

Whether rich or poor, some people seem to think they are entitled. I think it is especially prevalent in the States because we have so much available to us--so many things we do not need. This phenomenon can make people who have excessive riches act entitled and rude to those they see as beneath them. On the other hand the same phenomenon can make people who cannot afford to purchase the things they need, let alone the things they want, angry and entitled to take that anger out however they wish. 

Think about it both groups act the same. They throw trash on the street instead of in a trash can, they yap on the cell phone and text while driving (even though it is illegal in many cities) causing accidents and deaths, they speed, they drive intoxicated, they do not yield to you on the sidewalk. When a person feels entitled whether they have means or not they act the same rude, uncaring way to those around them.

Now if I were a practicing Buddhist, I would probably not get upset about this, but feel compassion for everyone no matter how awful they seem to be behaving. I doubt I will ever practice Buddhism to that extent, however, if I could become more mindful, I think I could find more compassion in my heart for people, the same as I do for animals. Animals truly suffer at the hands of humans and I always have compassion for them, no exceptions.

If I could handle the emotional distress I would work with animals. It would be truly fulfilling to decrease homelessness and cruelty to animals. I can't do it. I cannot handle it mentally. Seeing animals suffer is so heart wrenching and depressing--I hate those Humane Society commercials where they play that Willie Nelson song or the Sarah McLachlan song, and show tapes of abused animals suffering and trembling. I have to turn the channel immediately, because once I cried for a 1/2 hour. TOMA and I do what we can in a small way. The people who devote their lives to helping animals are real heros. They get paid little or nothing and work hard to take care of defenseless animals. 

Sometimes I believe that this country could feed all of the hungry and homeless animals and people if people were not so greedy. There would be fewer homeless animals if people would spay and neuter their pets. Not only would they not reproduce unwanted animals, but a lot of the behavioral problems that make people kick an animal out onto the street or take it to the death shelter are due to not spaying or neutering the animal to begin with! It goes back to my original gripe--people are the problem.

Stepping off the soapbox...

Baci e abbracci--and a belated L'Shana Tova!